Your baby is the star of your eyes alright, and we are equally excited about seeing your Instagram feed full of cute baby pics. But, alongside we also understand that a new mom, beside clicking and uploading sweet moments with her kid, undergoes many challenges, which are generally not spoken openly or at times are considered normal. So, here we are to share some such issues and strategies to deal with it.
Breastfeeding: A new baby and breastfeeding comes hand in hand. Although, it is considered natural, scientific discourses have proven that although as an activity it is natural, but for every individual the experience is different and it takes time for one to get on with this activity as natural. At the core of it, understand that breastfeeding is all about creating and building that new connection between the child and mom. So, the first rule is to be patient as one will get to understand the nuances with time, but for any critical difficulty, it’s always best to talk to a trained professional or a medical expert.
Your Relationship with Your Partner: Well, let’s talk about a fact that’s neither easy to accept nor share with anyone, but is common nonetheless. It is about difficulty in maintaining amicability between the new mom and dad. Manoeuvring a new reality as a new parent comes along with a whole lot of responsibility and stress, which affect even the strongest relationship. To overcome this challenge in partner dynamics, it is important for both the partners to realise that both are doing their best to participate and contribute meaningfully in this new situation. Also, it is important to accept and acknowledge the fact that this is going to be a stressful situation for a while and therefore, it is equally important to talk and share every minute details of how both the new parents feel with each other.
Feeling Obese and Unhappy: Our attention to media glamour has often set unattainable standards for us. Post-pregnancy weight is yet another topic that bogs down new moms to no end. Magazines, social media, television, films, every piece of infotainment shares visual and narratives where our favourite celebrities have lost their post-pregnancy weight in a blink. But, even before we start comparing ourselves with the celebs it is important to understand and accept each other’s reality. There’s no harm in losing weight but it is important to focus on being healthy, both physically and mentally. Setting a few minutes during the day to just briskly walk or stroll with the baby is sure to uplift your mood and feel energetic and better.
Getting Back To The Job: It’s a tough decision that every new mom has to make – going back to the job, how and when! It’s important and therefore a catch-22 situation that one has to deal with. One way to deal with this situation is to talk about their issue with other moms, who have been in a similar situation in the past. Also, if possible, give yourself some time before you resume. This is to just get a hang of the new situation and demands, and then seamlessly combining the old and the new routines together. Also remember that decision once taken can always be changed in favour of your situation, and to gauge that you are the best judge. So, take it slow and decide mindfully. In such a situation your employer can often be the best help you need by allowing you to work flexi-hours or give you part-time opportunities.
You Think You Have to Be Perfect: The simple answer is NO. No one is perfect and only practice makes one perfect. Just aim to be a ‘good-enough-mother-for-your-kid’ that will resolve the situation beautifully. Accept the flaws, be open to do mistakes and learn from wherever you falter. Be confident in knowing that you understand and know your baby’s need the best and you are the one, who can tend to all of it with little help from people around. Also, understand, there no NEED to be perfect.
To accept the challenges well, your first and foremost approach should be to ignore any criticism that pulls you down and focus on words of appreciation and encouragement that makes you feel truly good.